Everyday Thoughts

Beautiful Sunday

As time gets nearer and nearer to july..My heart beats harder and harder.I can't help it.I'm a mixture of both happy/sad.Both excited/fearful.

I tendered my resignation with a sigh of relief.A relief from all the responsibilities and worries.A relief from the hectic burden an auditor carries and is demanded from.A relief that I have finally made a decision and executed it.No doubt,I am going to miss the exponential learning curve from this knowledge house.I'm definitely going to miss the colleagues who are at the same age group,who shares similar goals/competition.The zest everyone has towards getting the job done & minding over who does a better job at it.(lol!)And of course,minding over one another all the time.(this,i'm not sure whether i will miss or not)

I'm not getting any younger with many more issues going through my mind.This round,the letting go process is definitely deeper and will take a longer time.I wonder,how did the Buddha let go his wife & child?!(and family and kingdom & along with it-power,wealth,fame,comfortability..etc).Definitely,lots to think about,lots of arrangements in which he needs to settle before his journey.(I sure hope/assume he was responsible in delegating his duties!!)I would say,it probably took him,a year to prepare?Just guessing.

Today,at Rumah Hope,we were supposed to read out what everyone says about us individually.We wrote it onto a piece of paper and put it into respective envelopes a week before.Everyone goes back feeling so good about themselves-including me.:)

It's so late now.But,I'm still wondering about....what will happen,what will become of me?What is my life's route?If I knew,it's so much easier to plan...(hahah.but less fun).Will type my thoughts another time. For now,I will take a break.

At Yamaha,the annual concert is a day after I leave.So,my percussion performance,which I have practiced along with other fellow teachers for weeks...will not happen.I guess,I just am not meant to attend the annual concert this time round.Sigh.Was/am pretty disappointed,actually.Wat can do?They will have to find a replacement teacher to play the cymbals. :( :(

Letting go is so hard to do.
Holding on is not easy either. sigh!

posted by Songie @ 12:32 AM