Tuesday, July 15, 2008



Someone once told me that happiness is just a reflection of unhappiness.

I never did understood it as well then. I guess, one would not have known truly,how valuable happiness is until he/she is faced with unhappiness. Therefore, a happy life, is an ignorant life? Only when one is not prepared to face the other side, I suppose. Then again, how much preparation can a person do?

Also, I learn that, no one owns anybody. We never can, and never will. Ppl whom we "hold" so dearly to, will really, one day, part from us. Theoretically, it all sounds, oh-so-distant, but when reality hits u, it hits u hard. Ppl near and dear,animals, or even precious things..... ah, the concept of impermanence has never resounded so loud and clear!

Why do I cling to something familiar so tightly? What I like, what I dislike, who I like, who I dislike? Suddenly, I find myself in a position where I just- wonder if it is much more helpful to construct, or much better to de-construct?

Happiness. Everyone wants to be happy. Who doesn't? But when happiness comes from selfish acts of me,mine & ours.... what good does it create except for unhappiness, lurking in the shadows? I have come to understand that, as much as I try to respect this simple fact that everyone has the 'right' to be happy, it soon dawned upon me that pursuing ones' own happiness at the expense of another, is not acceptable. In my code of life's conduct, at least. Eventually, someone will get hurt.

Remarkable how little things can teach so much. How truly simple truth is but I fail to see. How distorted my perceptions were,and still is. Who knows,a few months from now, (even in a hr's time) I will see things in a different angle again. What then,is me or mine except for the "now" in this present moment?!

I digress. I like the saying : If the act is good for u, good for others, then the act is good. I guess it could be applied to happiness as well. Hah!Easier said than done.I openly admit that I do not have the ability to discern my every move, my every actions, to accommodate everyone's "happiness". So, therefore, I have to understand that I am deeply flawed.So is everyone else. Then, comes the understanding that no one I know in person is perfect. In that case, the main gist to this is, do I have the big of heart to accept this fact? Forgiveness when things aren't perfect?

I'm only human. Is this what that means? That we are all selfish to an extent.

I'm not sure. I'm sleepy....maybe that's why. This blog needs amendments.... :D :D