Blog!
Monday: 6.30pm
First day of class, getting me all excited again.20th and 21st century repertoire studies!whohhoh!Darn long list to listen-MUSIC AGAIN!Many many essays to write and I met performers and will be their critical listeners!whohhoh!This semester is going to be tough.Pray I get through this alive.Pray Pray.
Grateful
Bow down low- v.v. low. THANK U TO ALL- to ....so many things and ppl n ....stars??
happeninggg...a..a.a...
Blank1
Dear blog,what will I do without you?
Trip was excellent!Ajahn Kalyano-deep respect to you.The aura that you carry with you;a very great man indeed.(and all the other disciples)I was moved and truly inspired by just,your presence(until now)-really badly wanting to go for the 10day retreat but it costs $315.Too expensive :((((( Been thinking about it for a while now....I guess I will have to settle for the 3day $70 instead.:(((
Mm.Let me share with everyone!
This is the entrance to Bodhivana Monastery.The forest behind is where the monks live.
The hall-for dana,etc.
Inside of the hall
gift from Ajahn
Whoops..sorry no more time to upload pics.Late for work...
LOL!!
Early morning,sms mom:
"Dear MAPA,will be going to the forest monastery where the monks live.Will go with a temple friend.He will drive there with his friends.It is one and half hour journey."
2nd sms:
"It is going to be interesting because the monks there are serious and wise.I will take photos.Lent camera from neel.Have good day yourself ok!Love-SHern"
Mom replied:
"Wild animals r dangerous do not go near n touch them pls be careful"
15mins later,2nd sms:
"Sorry monks I thought shortform is monkey u know my englishlah I just wake up when I hear yr sms voice brain still blur..Sorry!!"
LAUGH OUT LOUD...ROLLING OFF FLOOR...GIGGLING...!!
12.30pm Printout
Date: 17/2/06 (12.30pm at AE blogging away…)
Dearest Journal,
I am determined to make the ‘blog mood’ change back to a lighter and brighter colour again. Was reading my past blogs, especially on those where I had just recently arrived to Aus. Chirpy, bubbly, happy Songie! May I have the strength to continue doing what I love and have courage, confidence and determination. May I constantly count my blessings and not overwhelm myself with unnecessary worries and negativity. I understand that my optimism and energy is essential, not only for myself, but that it influences everyone around me as well. Things will flow accordingly and that it is just my greed and impatience which is getting in the way. Everything happens at the right time, right moment, right place and that, May I constantly remind myself time and again how good things have turned out for me all my life. I am still a V. LUCKY girl. ^-^
May my friends find strength in solving their problems and in subsiding their worries.
Thank you J for the excellent conversation which inspires me, encourages me and help me clear the fog in my head and providing a window of opportunity to understand the Dhamma at a deeper level.
Thank you Mr&MrsK for boundless support and for being surrogate parents to me.
Thank you NL for being patient with me, for such care and concern that I am deeply touched by the kindness and compassion shown to me. For being tolerant over my behaviour and for being such a great housemate, family, friend, confidante and for being that black-dot-in-the-diamond only found in that-deep-blue-ocean which only you claim yourself to be! I am honoured and blessed to have been meeting great housemates all my life and you’re certainly one of them. (includes, Jo,SF,Eln,HW,AnE,SH,SY,D,NL)
Thank you SF&Kw for the care n concern; for that little miracles which you both have given me.
Metta to all-love and best wishes to all from me again. I’m sorry for being so self absorbed lately and that I will continue to inspire, compose beautiful strings of words until the day I expire.
Family-MaPaBeeKoKak-I love you all dearly dearly dearly. Nobody bully my family or I’ll kick u. Utmost importance: Health, Peace & Less Worry amongst one another.
ElnFW-May u find satisfaction&passion in things that you do.
JoA,Jo,MY,BK,ML,FM,Lini-May u be surrounded with love&happiness
Fadz,SY,Ad,Imn,Ginni,Nghbr-Kreen&Dan-Positivity,courage,kindness showered onto u in times of need.
EK-that you land urself in a wonderful job n great family prospects lying ahead of you
Ppl in AE-Excellent ppl in trying to make things work for the company. Thank you for the opportunity,MH,Nk,Jck,Jf1,Jf2(all ze great managers).Supportive colleagues/friends-Leonor,Kaye,Dle,Kim;wonderful experience.
Life ooh Life! Can’t wait to organize myself for a retreat. Oh pls.
Upcoming events
1)ForestMonastery (to attend retreat in March?Dunno)
2)FW's visit
3)Teaching excellent,smart,imaginative & hardworking students-real real challenge
4)Meeting friends(kalyana mitras?I hope so)
5)Prepare for semester to start
6)Look for job?
7)Get involved with temple activities?oh yeaaa....plsszzszszszsz
SmileyBlog
Before I get bombarded by many more witty comments.....I'm doing good.Next week last week of work.Uncertainty again.What was making me so upset?Uncertainty.But I used to be v.excited over change.Guess I'm in need of something certain in my life.That can never be the case in life.Another thing which made me feel lingo up is the fact that I'm more than a quarter century old and am
single.Go on,laugh.If I dare to write it here,it means I dare to be laughed at.Only now that it dawned upon me to look for someone.Late?Yea,but I had(cewah...'had' ler now) excellent,fantastic,fabulous single years and I realize,I have enjoyed enough. :)
Blabberings on my life has taken all over me.Wanting this wanting that,I want more more more!How chocking and how strangling that feels.Yesterday,I wrote down a list of blessings in disguise for me and I need to do that more often.Like ML,'little butterfly,how nice of u to flutter by' (or something like that). Happy thoughts,always worth retaining.
I'm v.v.blessed to have met extremely important ppl here.Mr&MrsK and NL(hsemate).Now,I'm meeting J,who will organize a short trip with another friend on Sat to Warburton-the forest monastery.I AM SO EXCITED!!Next week,FW will come over to visit.Time for uplifteing mood again.SURFING BOARD...HIT THE WAVESSSSS!!
Back to the singular word.If ppl like Imn can find a wife...why can't I??LOL!!HAHA!!But it's true.I guess,I'll meet someone,but if not,I shldn't sweat about it because it's YOUR LOSS!lol.... cewah, konfident la now. Boy I miss Lini&Fadz.
3 of my ex-hsemates are getting married this year(AnE,SH,SY).I was moved to tears(out of happiness,I ASSURE U)...because of their commitment & determination to make it through with their spouse.3 weddings in a year!Overwhelming!SO HAPPY FOR YOU THREE!AGH!*****beaming & smiling******
Sadhu also for mood change.For the courage to keep on typing and for the people around me.Thank you.*bows down low*
Stream
Yellow sticky ball flows down the stream......
TurnTurnTurn
Turnturnturn!!moodchangeturn!
EppyburpychirpiebloopieSongie back again!(I hope!)
:) Hugz to all-thx so much.Been a rough week for me,I don't deny it's still rough but,hopefully,in due time,will be better.
SriLankan Youth Support Movement
Mr&MrsK got me involved in the Youth Support Movement.Last sunday,I was asked to give a short sharing session on my past experiences with WW9,Incovar,YouthCamp,blabla.Mainly focusing on WW9,though.WHOH!Inspired the youth,and I'm asked to aid them in establishing the youth group.Now,I'm involved in the group thing.lol!Thx MrsK for asking me to do this!yay!!
BSV
Finally,met J and went to BSV.Talk given by Msian ex-monk?lol!This Sat,going to monastery.I'm glad.Thx J!!!
As for things happening..yea..it's all happening.I am starting to count my blessings again.Excellent life,excellent...uplifting mood again.Again,thx to all.Suddenly I realize,this blog is becoming too community..scaryyy....happy bcoz I know there's feichai,miracle8,mistyjo,cmeel,pikachu around to keep me accompanied(occassionally,wacky comments from ade/iman,supportive ones from FM,wli).I am so glad,I'm not alone but u all are around!~~I FEel GoOOD~~ (tadatada tada da...yknow the song..)
Yknow why I was upset ah?Stupid reason ler.Next time I write about it-when I am able to laugh at myself.For now,not yet.
Pianopiano piano...the most ingenious instrument ever invented!!(of course,now,it's all the synthesizers,digital surround sound instruments which is far more extreme..la..)This coming semester-jengjengjeng....haven't enrolled for my '20th and 21st century' subject.Wat will unfold???? Blackeyedpeas as an assignment??!I don't mind NoDoubt!lol.
blieblablie..like this.bleck..after calling MAPA just now...
Adagio Cantabile
Slow but in a singing style-adagio cantabile.
What I needIpod or some recording gadget.
More and more and more and more songs to listen and analyze.
What I wantSomeone/somewhere whom/where I can vent my frustrations,or rather,whinge.
What I shouldLess self focused,more giving and more open,less restrictive,less rigid and more carefree
What I willStay focused 2006.Enjoy this coming semester,observations,planning and preparation at its peak.
What I amListening to classical at the moment.Inspired.
Exploring musical possibilities on the keyboard/piano,am improving,this I know.Greater understanding of the compass.Just basic major chds.Now,I want to have a breakthrough on 'tonal procedures on chromatic harmony'.What the heck is this?!
What I have toTo start my journey to Mr&MrsK's plc.Tomorrow,meet J to BSV temple.Last week,to church.Who knows,next week,...
Kalyana Mitras
I shld quickly blog-to say I'm allrite.:) Of course,u know I'm lying.LOL!What i'm saying is,I -will-be allrite.Waves,remember?It just happens that I have decided to write during one of its troughs...which I normally don't do.Theoretically;always retain happy tots,n unhappy ones,why remember em?Like a sine graph,if u draw a line on its peak,u'll maintain a steady peak!cewah!
WorkSo many things happening.I'm into my 7th week as an analyst,and on the 8th week,my last week.Just today,my manager tells me that I have a presentation to do soon.Cool.Nervous as I may sound,I am looking forward to an opportunity to voice out.After this,job hunt again...or full time study,I don't know.Lingo again.
How was work?Great manager!Work well with her and I should say;with confidence,that I have delivered what she expected from me.One major glitch,which threw me back once but apart from that,I shld say,it was allrite.:) Good effort.Only thing;communication wise...I've learnt loads of swearing words.LOL!
They have gotten 'used' to my presence,and it's nice to feel 'accepted'amongst them.I wonder if they've got other positions in store for me since my 'project' has come to an end?Oh,I hope so but shldn't put my hopes in too high.One thing for sure,they all talk damn much.Or rather,I prefer not to talk as much during work and just merely focus on work(boring beancounter,tat's what I am).
Unhappy
I'm pretty unhappy this week.What a change from a normal chirpy,bubbly songie that I know.Where is she?This is probably one of a rare blog which states outright,I'm not in a good mood.(Am?or was?)And I've got only 10-15 mins to blog about it. :)
Well,there are good times and bad times.Lini for her precious,beautiful CNY card.Made my day change from bleak to sunshine.^-^. If one asks,what am I upset about??You think too much,Songie!I wld say-hay,I'm human too.You can't always have Songie cheerful,cheeky and all.Well,at least,I choose to be that way.But this time,I'm just going to invite unhappiness in to stay.Welcome,I want to sulk. LOL!
Blame it on CNY,blame it on PMS,blame it on err...I can't think of anything else,or rather,want to blame it on anything else.Beautiful blog.
Today is Feb8,Wed morning.I have been here for past 7mths!!Wow.Not much observations lately,just discovery and my room is in total mess!(Probably,tat reflects how my thought flow is at the moment too.Just rojak).Need to pay my fees today.Need to clean my room and clear all the rubbish in my head!Haven't been doing spring cleaning.
uuwwa..:( I'm just wanting to be unhappy.Bliblablie.I dislike dishonesty.Is witholding information dishonesty?Shld I apply for postgrad rep of Arts Faculty?Shld I do full time?Shld I apply for this other job as an analyst?Shld I get going----yes,I sld stop now.
200
This time,to make it through the 200th blog took me 2 re-writes and loads of thinking and growing up.Finally,today is a breakthrough.So,I'm so much more clear now.Of course,in due time,clarity will blur again,and then I will have to find my way-again.
Happy Independence Day-SriLanka-Feb 4th.Went for the 'celebration' in DUni organized by MrsK..... loads of history lesson dated back 2500yrs BC even including the Lord Buddha and how He was welcomed to SriLanka and Buddhism flourished.
So many things to learn everyday.So many many things.Year of 2006-what will my aspirations be? If I keep on typing, I will surely find my way. For now,actually, I have a headache and I cannot continue on.Will this be another draft?
Heck no,will post it up today.
